Check all that apply
- You lost friends after a big life change -- move, new job, baby, marriage.
- You don't go to that gym anymore, but wish you had stayed in contact with those friends.
- You didn't see anyone model adult friendships.
- You became a parent and you are struggling to figure out how friendships fit in.
- You feel guilty for never calling that one friend.
- You aren't sure what you have in common with your friends anymore.
- You realized all your friends live far away.
- You don't to hang out with friends in the same ways anymore (bar hopping, shopping, gossiping).
- You are exhausted by the idea of throwing a party.
- You want to be able to just call a friend to say "What are you doing right now?"
- You wish you had a group of friends.
- You barely see/talk to your friends anymore.
- You feel like all your friends are your partners friends.
- You feel like a friendship has changed, but you don't know why.
- You haven't prioritized friendships + community for years.
- You wonder who actually has time for friendships.
- You are tired of superficial friendships.
- You've found yourself in a room full of people, but you feel lonely.
- You think you are the problem. Everyone else has friends, so "something is wrong with me."
- You've tried to make new friends, but they fizzle out after just a couple of hangouts.
- You feel like you are always invited to the party, but never quite part of the group.
- You go places and meet people, but don't know how to move to get closer.
- You _____________________ (fill in the blank because there are one million more answers).
i don't know a single person that can't check at least one box.
Not many people are talking about this stuff... until now.
we're not cool. we just show up.
small actions add up.
1. Do less
Raise your hand if you feel like you have to show up in all the ways for your people. NOPE. Not around here. We believe you should show up in the ways you show up best and let someone else do the other things. Check out our series "How to decide what not to do."
4. Small actions add up!
You made some space above. Now decide on a manageable goal -- One hangout a month? 15 mins to catch up on texts a day? One facetime a month? Pick a small goal. Very small. Probably just a singular one, so you can stay accountable to yourself. After you've done it multiple times in a row, you can add another small goal.
2. Is there a person or a group you procrastinate getting back to?
Let yourself off the hook. Seriously. You can press PAUSE. You can decide to give yourself a break and see if you wanna keep putting energy into that relationship or not.
5. Pick two people. SCHEDULE.
Pick two people you want to see (not you feel like you should see. You want to connect with them). Schedule a time in your calendar to connect in whatever way works for you -- call, hang out in person, a walk, a workout class. a "thinking of you" text
3. Decide how you communicate best
Set some boundaries. Decide what works best for you -- Text, Facetime, In-Person, Phone Calls, DM -- whatever it is. Start communicating that. "Hey! I wanna chat, but texting is easier during the day." or "I love when you send me that video, but can we not then start talking in the DMs. I'll won't miss your message if it's in my texts."
6. Repeat
Text, Facetime, In-Person, Phone Calls, DM -- whatever it is, do it.
start here
Lean in. I’ve got a secret for you
you are probably trying to doing too much.
So the first step is to take a couple things off your plate.
After that you’ll want to make one small goal for the month.
Just one.
small actions add up.
you want this
Everyone is unique and that includes how we like to connect with our people, share in our friendships and build a community.
The Community Audit is a workbook that will guide you through a deep dive into your current community+ how you like to show up. It will help you design a plan for how to act intentionally to cultivate the community you are dreaming of.
Find your version of "feels good."
consider this
We set all sorts of goals — health, finance, career, family, romantic.
It’s a well known fact accountability helps us achieve our goals.
You want to make new friends or join a group or work on old friendships, but you are nervous? Maybe things don’t work out?
