Picture this:
It’s 2 am. You’re in college. You walk five minutes across campus to your friend’s dorm.
You knock on the door. They’re awake. Of course they’re awake.
You play Super Smash Bros until 4 am. Then you crash on their couch.
Nobody had to text. Nobody had to plan. Nobody had to drive 45 minutes.
You just… showed up.
Now picture this:
It’s one year later. You’ve graduated. You’re back in your hometown.
You text your friend: “Want to hang out this weekend?”
They text back: “Yeah, for sure!”
Saturday comes. Nothing happens.
Sunday comes. Still nothing.
You do this every single weekend for months.
And you’re sitting there thinking: When did hanging out with my friends get so hard?
That’s exactly what happened to Jason Edmonds.
He graduated from a tiny liberal arts college on the East Coast (350 people in his freshman class). The kind of place where everyone knew each other. Where you could walk five minutes to find someone to hang out with.
Then he moved back to Seattle.
One plane ride. Across the country.
And suddenly, everything felt different.
The Jarring Transition Nobody Warns You About
Jason had friends in Seattle. That wasn’t the problem.
The problem was: One friend lived in Woodinville (30+ minutes away). Another in Seattle proper. Another up north in Lynnwood.
Making plans suddenly required… actual planning.
“We’re not the best planners,” Jason told me. “I’m not sure if this is a guy thing, but we would say ‘Oh yeah, this weekend we’re gonna for sure hang.’ And nothing would happen. The next weekend: ‘All right, let’s hang.’ Nothing would happen.”
Same conversation. Every single weekend.
In college, hanging out was effortless. You knew where to find people. The dining hall. The dorm next door. The library at midnight.
Now? Now it required coordinating schedules, choosing an activity, driving across the city, hoping nobody canceled last minute.
“When did this get so hard?” Jason kept thinking.
And here’s the thing that nobody talks about:
When you’re in your early 20s, fresh out of college, you don’t EXPECT it to be hard.
You’ve heard about people in their 30s and 40s struggling to make friends. You think: Well, that won’t be me. I’m young. I’m social. I like going out. I know how to make friends.
But college friendship and adult friendship?
They’re completely different games.
What Jason Tried (And Why It Didn’t Work)
So Jason did what any resourceful person would do:
He tried to find his people.
Attempt #1: Meetup Groups
“It wasn’t bad,” he said. “I definitely met some people.”
But it didn’t feel quite right.
The events were big. You’d talk to one person for two minutes, then move to another conversation for two minutes. Little pockets of 4-5 people, but only for five minutes at a time.
“Yes, I might meet 50 people in one night,” Jason said. “But I was really looking to talk to maybe two or three people and actually KNOW them. Learn about what makes them tick.”
Those spaces didn’t have room for that kind of connection.
Unless he asked for contact info and followed up. Which he never really did.
Attempt #2: Networking Events
“I have less to say about networking events,” Jason laughed.
He’s not a fan.
“It’s always felt a little transactional to me. One meaningful connection is way better than 50 ‘hey’ connections.”
He wanted depth. Not breadth.
The Pattern He Noticed
Every event felt the same:
- ▪️ Large groups
- ▪️ Surface-level conversations
- ▪️ Lots of people, but no real connection
- ▪️ No built-in way to go deeper
“I felt like the common thing was: I talked to one person for two minutes, then moved on. Someone leaves, someone new comes in. You’re meeting tons of people but not really MEETING anyone.”
And Jason realized:
He couldn’t find what he was looking for.
So he decided to create it himself.
Enter: Six Degrees
Jason started Six Degrees in February 2025.
The concept: It’s like blind dating, but for making friends.
Here’s how it works:
Step 1: You take a personality quiz
Not a long one. Just enough to understand your vibe and preferences.
Step 2: They match you into small groups of 4-6 people
Using an algorithm Jason developed. People who align with your personality and interests.
Step 3: You show up to an event
Gingerbread house decorating. Mini golf. Secret dinners. Jazz nights. Matcha walks.
Step 4: You meet your small group
You have 4-6 people you’re specifically matched with. But you’re also part of a bigger group (usually 15-25 people total).
So if your small group doesn’t click? You have other people to talk to.
If your small group DOES click? You have a more intimate space to actually get to know them.
“I wanted to make every event feel like a smaller group gathering,” Jason explained. “Even in a group of 30-40 people, you still have 4-5 curated people you can really talk to on a deeper level.”
Why Activities Matter (More Than You Think)
Here’s something Jason figured out early:
Activities create natural vulnerability.
Think about it:
If you’re at a bar trying to make friends, you have to:
- ▪️ Walk up to someone
- ▪️ Introduce yourself
- ▪️ Think of something to say
- ▪️ Keep the conversation going
- ▪️ Hope it’s not awkward
If you’re decorating a gingerbread house together?
You can make fun of each other’s terrible decorating skills. You can laugh when someone’s house collapses (Jason’s did). You can bond over the shared experience of being hilariously bad at something.
“Activities have been a really fun way to bond with friends over time,” Jason said. “It’s an easy conversation starter. Like, hey, we can poke fun at our mini golf skills and leave with a closer bond as a result.”
The Gingerbread House Story
At one of Jason’s recent events, his gingerbread house completely collapsed.
“My thing fell apart and I was like, well, this sucks.”
But then he looked around.
Other people’s houses were also collapsing.
And everyone was laughing about it together.
“That was a moment of bonding that’s pretty rare as an adult,” he told me.
And here’s what I realized listening to him:
That gingerbread house vulnerability is PRACTICE for the stuff that really matters.
You’re practicing admitting: “I don’t have it together.”
In a low-stakes way.
So that when the HIGH-stakes stuff happens (a bad performance review, a relationship ending, a family crisis) you already know how to be vulnerable with these people.
You’ve already practiced not being perfect together.
The One Problem Jason Hasn’t Solved (Yet)
Okay, so you go to a Six Degrees event.
You meet someone you really vibe with.
You exchange Instagram handles.
Now what?
You still have to follow up.
“That part still takes someone doing the reaching out,” Jason admitted. “I haven’t quite figured out how to make it not that way.”
(He’s working on a solution for this, but he can’t share details yet. I’m on the edge of my seat.)
Jason’s story about making friends after college is full of relatable moments and hard-won lessons. Listen to the full episode to hear his journey.
How Jason Made His First Friend Through Six Degrees
The first friend Jason made through his own events was a guy named PJ.
PJ hit him up on Instagram after a secret dinner event.
“He was basically asking to hang out again. And I was like, oh yeah, sure, let’s do it.”
They played FIFA. Sat on the couch. Had a great time.
That’s it. That’s the formula:
- Meet at an event
- Have a good conversation
- Someone reaches out
- You hang out again
“I think Six Degrees and a lot of these social scenarios are a really good way to kick the conversation off and find someone you genuinely vibe with,” Jason said. “But it does take someone doing the reaching out to set up that next thing.”
Why Following Up Feels So Scary (And Why You Should Do It Anyway)
Jason knows this part is hard.
“I understand it can be very scary.”
But here’s what he wants you to know:
“Usually the other person is on the same page.”
If you talked for an hour or two at the event. If they gave you their Instagram or number. If they seemed genuinely interested.
They probably want to hang out again too.
“The worst case scenario is it wasn’t reciprocated and that’s fine. You’re right back where you started.”
You didn’t lose anything. You just tried.
And that’s better than living with missed connections.
The Vulnerability of Admitting You Need Help Making Friends
Okay, let’s talk about the elephant in the room:
There’s a stigma around needing help to make friends.
Especially when you’re young. Especially when you just came from college where friends were LIFE.
It feels like admitting failure.
Like: “I should be able to do this on my own. What’s wrong with me?”
Jason felt this too.
“I used to think of myself like, oh, maybe I’m some socially awkward person. Maybe this is my fault for not putting myself out there.”
But here’s what he learned:
“It’s not your fault.”
Why This Transition Is So Hard (And It’s Not About You)
Let’s break down what actually changed:
In college:
- ▪️ Proximity: Everyone lived within 5 minutes of each other
- ▪️ Shared schedule: Everyone had similar rhythms (classes, dining hall, late nights)
- ▪️ Built-in activities: Clubs, sports, parties, study groups
- ▪️ Socially acceptable vulnerability: Staying up until 6am and bombing your final? Your friends laugh about it with you
- ▪️ Shared life stage: Everyone’s figuring out the same stuff at the same time
After college:
- ▪️ Scattered geography: Friends live 30+ minutes apart in different directions
- ▪️ Mismatched schedules: Everyone works different hours, has different commitments
- ▪️ No built-in activities: You have to actively plan everything
- ▪️ Pressure to “have it together”: Admitting you messed up at work feels embarrassing, not funny
- ▪️ Different life stages: Some people want an extension of college. Others are buttoned-up adults. You’re trying to figure out who YOU are.
“College is freedom without responsibility,” Jason said. “Adulthood is freedom WITH responsibility. And that responsibility factor really changes things.”
The Other Thing That Changes: Vulnerability
In college, you’re comfortable showing all the messy, not-put-together parts of yourself.
As a young adult?
There’s pressure to put up a front. To show that you have your stuff together. That you work a good job, live in a nice apartment, make decent money.
“We’re so much less comfortable showing the not-so-put-together parts about ourselves,” Jason said.
And that makes it harder to connect deeply.
Because real friendship requires vulnerability.
But vulnerability feels risky when you’re trying to prove you’re a Functioning Adult™.
What Jason Wants You to Know
If you’re in this transition right now: graduated, moved to a new city, feeling like making friends suddenly got impossibly hard… here’s what Jason wants you to hear:
1. It’s Not Your Fault
“At the end of the day, it’s really not anybody’s fault.”
You’re not socially awkward. You’re not failing at something that should be easy.
The game changed. And nobody gave you a rulebook.
There’s no blueprint for:
- ▪️ Graduating college
- ▪️ Moving to a new city
- ▪️ Adjusting to post-grad life
- ▪️ Meeting new people
- ▪️ Finding people who fit your exact season of life
“It’s not your fault for feeling this way,” Jason said.
2. You’re Wired for Connection
“We are wired for social connection. We’re wired for community. We’re wired for that sense of belonging and support.”
Wanting friends isn’t needy. It’s human.
Admitting you’re struggling to find your people isn’t pathetic. It’s honest.
Using tools and events and apps to help you make friends?
That’s just being resourceful.
3. People at These Events Are Normal
Jason knows what you’re thinking:
“If I go to a ‘make friends’ event, won’t it be full of socially awkward people who can’t make friends?”
No.
“Everyone there is just very normal people like yourself who are going through this,” Jason said.
The biggest percentage of people at Six Degrees events?
People who just moved to Seattle in the last two months.
They’re not weird. They’re not awkward.
They just don’t know anyone yet.
Other people who come:
- ▪️ Career-focused people working 12-14 hour days who need to outsource friend-making
- ▪️ People whose college friends all moved to different cities
- ▪️ People who want to expand their social circle beyond their current friend group
- ▪️ People in a new life stage looking for friends who match where they’re at
There are SO many reasons someone might show up.
None of them are shameful.
We dig into why this transition is so hard and what actually works. Tune into the complete episode for all of Jason’s advice.
The Thing About Missed Connections
Jason thinks about this a lot:
“How many missed connections do we have?”
You miss a connection by:
- ▪️ Not going out in the first place
- ▪️ Going out but not following up
- ▪️ Following up but not being vulnerable
- ▪️ Being vulnerable but giving up too soon
“Do we want to live our lives with missed connections?”
Jason doesn’t.
“I want to live my life as someone who doesn’t have regrets. Who did the things they wanted to do? Who put themselves out there.”
“Even if it was awkward or I got burned a few times, at least I flipped over the rock and saw what was on the other side.”
That’s his approach to making friends now.
And honestly? It’s working.
In less than a year, Six Degrees has helped hundreds of people in Seattle find their people.
Including Jason himself.
What You Can Do (Even If You’re Not in Seattle)
Okay, so maybe you don’t live in Seattle. Maybe there’s no Six Degrees in your city.
Here’s what you can still take from Jason’s story:
1. Create What You’re Looking For
Jason couldn’t find the kind of group he wanted.
So he created it.
You might not start a whole matchmaking service. But you CAN:
- ▪️ Organize a monthly game night
- ▪️ Start a hiking group
- ▪️ Host a potluck for people in your apartment building
- ▪️ Create a book club
- ▪️ Plan a standing coffee date
Be the person who initiates.
2. Activity > Just Hanging Out
When you’re trying to make new friends or deepen existing friendships:
Pick an activity.
Not just “let’s hang out this weekend.”
But: “Want to go to that new mini golf place on Saturday at 3pm?”
Activities give you:
- ▪️ A concrete plan (easier to commit)
- ▪️ Something to talk about (natural conversation starter)
- ▪️ Shared experience (bonding opportunity)
- ▪️ Built-in vulnerability (you’re both probably not great at mini golf)
3. Follow Up (Even Though It’s Scary)
If you meet someone you vibe with:
Reach out.
Send them a message. Suggest hanging out again.
Yes, it’s vulnerable. Yes, they might not respond.
But what if they do?
What if that one message turns into a friendship that changes your life?
“Usually the other person is on the same page,” Jason reminded me. “If you talked for an hour or two, they probably want to hang out again too.”
4. Lower the Barriers
Think about what makes it hard for people to show up to things YOU organize.
Then remove those barriers.
Jason did this by:
- ▪️ Pre-matching people (so you’re not walking in completely alone)
- ▪️ Choosing activities (so there’s a built-in conversation starter)
- ▪️ Keeping groups small-ish (15-25 people, not 100)
- ▪️ Making it clear what to expect (no surprises, no pressure)
What barriers can you remove for your friends?
5. Be Vulnerable About the Mess
Practice admitting you don’t have it together.
Start small:
- ▪️ “My gingerbread house is falling apart”
- ▪️ “I’m terrible at mini golf”
- ▪️ “I totally forgot to meal prep this week”
Work up to bigger stuff:
- ▪️ “I had a rough performance review”
- ▪️ “I’m struggling with money this month”
- ▪️ “I’m feeling really lonely lately”
The more you practice small vulnerability, the easier the big vulnerability gets.
If You’re in Seattle
If Jason’s story resonated and you’re in the Seattle area:
Check out Six Degrees.
Jason’s events happen throughout the month. Different activities. Different vibes.
You take the quiz. They match you. You show up.
That’s it.
No pressure to be “on.” No networking energy. No trying to work the room.
Just: show up and see what happens.
The Bottom Line
Here’s what I want you to take away from Jason’s story:
The transition from college to adult friendship is HARD.
And it’s not your fault.
One day, you’re walking five minutes to play Super Smash Bros at 2 am.
The next day, you’re texting about “hanging out this weekend,” and it never happens.
That whiplash is real. And it’s jarring for almost everyone.
You’re not broken. You’re not socially awkward. You’re not failing at something that should be easy.
You’re just playing a completely different game now.
And nobody gave you the rulebook.
So, if you need help? Get help.
Go to events. Use apps. Join groups. Hire a friendship coach. Listen to podcasts about friendship (hey, you’re already doing that one).
There’s no shame in being intentional about something that matters to you.
Jason created an entire business because he needed help making friends.
And now he’s helping hundreds of other people do the same thing.
That’s not a weakness. That’s resourcefulness.
So stop telling yourself you should be able to do this alone.
Stop feeling embarrassed that making friends feels hard right now.
And start doing something about it.
Because you deserve to have people.
You deserve to have friends you can text at 2 am (even if you can’t physically walk to their place anymore).
You deserve to have people who know you. Who sees you? Who shows up for you?
And if you need some help finding them?
That’s okay.
That’s human.
That’s actually really brave.
Navigating the post-college friendship transition? Check out Episode 21 where I talk with someone a few years older who went through the same thing. And if you’re struggling with the vulnerability of reaching out after meeting someone new, Episode 123 is all about making friends without proximity.
And if you’re in Seattle? Go check out Six Degrees. Tell Jason that Alex sent you. (There’s a discount code in the show notes.) Let me know how it goes.
If you’ve struggled to make friends after college, you’re not alone. Listen to the full episode for practical steps and encouragement.
